JB and The Milk Monster

You are JB, a squire living in the kingdom of Larion. You have a spear and a pack of supplies. You follow Sir Theo as he enters the forest, he turns to you and says "We will be back soon."

The next day you hear a loud noise from the direction of the village. It sounds like an explosion or something similar. The villagers are frightened by this noise and run away from their homes.


> "Sir Theo, i think I heard a loud noise coming from the villiage. I think its the milk monster."


"Yes, yes it is," Theo replies. He then tells his men to search for the source of the noise and they do so without any problems.

A few days pass and you continue your journey when you see a large group of people running towards you from the direction of the village.

 > "Sir Theo, why did it take 2 days to search the villiage and there are still people running from it? Surely we should do something. I Heard the milk monster shoots milk from its monsterous titties!"

 "I don't know what you're talking about, but that's not happening. We just need to wait until nightfall before we can go out and hunt him down."

Two more days pass and you continue on your journey when you see a huge creature standing in front of the village.

 > "Sir theo! It's the milk monster! Look at the size of its horrible breasts!"

 "It's not a milk monster, it's a giant spider. And if you keep calling it that, I'm going to start calling you a big fat ugly troll."

The Milk Monster is bigger than anything you've ever seen before.

 > "Alas you are correct. Here is your spear to kill the spider with, and your glasses to see what the hell is right in front of you that is most obviously a giant Milk Monster from hell."

 You throw your spear at the Milk Monster and it catches it easily.

You turn around and see the villagers running away from you. They were scared by the Milk Monster's appearance, which made them run away.

 > I taste the milk left behind from the milk monsters gigantic mammaries

 You feel the deliciousness of the milk. It tastes like heaven.

You look up and see a tall man wearing glasses sitting on top of a hill, watching you. His name is Sir Theo and he has been hunting Milk Monsters since he was young.

 > "Sir Theo, I think we should get the Milk Monster now. It's terrorizing the villiage and killing it's people."

 "No, no, no, we should wait. I mean the Milk Monster is probably still nearby and we don't want to attack it while it's asleep."

 > "Sir Theo, you are the dumbest fucking person I have ever met."

 "What?"
"You are the dumbest fucking person I have ever met. Why would you believe me? I am a stupid peasant who doesn't even understand how to use my own weapon properly."

He sighs and looks at you angrily.

 > "Get off the hill and save the Villiage Sir Theo, or I will be forced to do something stupid."

 You stop him and tell him to leave the hill.

"Why? What do you want me to do?"

"Just get off the hill, because if you don't, I will."

 > JB drinks the milk of the Milk Monster and begins to feel something powerful take over him

 You drink the milk and immediately feel something happen inside of you. The Milk Monster is back!

You begin to laugh maniacally as you shoot all your arrows into the Milk Monster, which causes it to fall off the hill. You then proceed to eat it alive.

 > JB absorbs the power of the milk monster by eating its flesh and grows huge fantastic tits in which to kill Sir Theo the Idiot with

 You grow enormous tits in which to kill Sir Theo the idiot. You then proceed to eat his body.

Your friends are very impressed by your actions.

 > "Here here good friends! See, I have used my new found power to kill Sir Theo, being he was dumbest Knight in all the land. Let us drink of my breast milk and be merry!"

 You drink some more milk and enjoy yourself.

And so ends the story of the Milk Monster.